Changing My Life

So yesterday, I had a bad start to the morning.  I've been running a lift club for the last 4 months, and keep getting messed around by the people who are driving with me.  Almost every morning I have to Whattsapp them to find out who is driving with me.  I tried to put rules in place like, if you haven't read my message by the time I get to the Durban Road turnoff, I'm going to keep driving;  if you aren't at my house at 6.05, I'm leaving, etc, but yesterday was the last straw.  One of them let me know the night before that he wasn't driving with me, but the other only let me know once I'd taken the long detour to where I pick him up and had arrived at the place.  I'm an extremely routine-driven person, and having this kind of uncertainty in my life has been driving me crazy.  And that's not to mention the incredible awkwardness of one of them - if I travel only with him, I feel so uncomfortable the whole way.  He is so socially awkward, it's almost impossible to have a conversation with him.

Anyway, this morning, knowing I didn't have to rush to be perfectly on time, didn't have to detour, or worry about who was driving with, was SUCH a relief.  It's crazy - Squirrel and I are at the stages of our life that we don't have to do things to accommodate other people.  I was saying to him last night that the message I'd gotten from my one friend, saying how glad she was to meet me, and how she considers me to be one of her best friends (which is mutual, by the way), was such a lovely way to start the day, and how I'm just ME, and yet people seem to like me!  Then I realised this morning how much I had actually been going out of my way to keep the people in the lift club happy.  It's actually nonsense - we're driving with my car only, which means I do all the driving, and my car takes all the maintenance costs and petrol.  And the irony is that I was at work well before 7am - I miscalculated how short the drive would be without the detours lol.

So, here's to a better day than yesterday - I left work early yesterday, went home, and went to sleep, because I was feeling so out-of-sorts.  Squirrel let me sleep, only waking me up with supper (he rocks. I love him SO much).  Then I finished my book, and went back to sleep.  It was such a lekker afternoon, I kinda want to do it again lol.

There is a guy who works here, who is loud, obnoxious, always has to insert himself into a conversation and then steer it his way, who is ignorant, selfish, and a total braggart (he only knows people who are famous, or number 1 in something in the world - yea right).  He started yelling to me a couple of weeks ago (in front of colleagues), about how much more than me he knows, and how I know nothing...  that was also the last straw for me.  I've been putting up with him, been trying to help him (as I always do), even though it's crystal clear he has psychological problems (he will take an entire bottle of anti-inflammatories in a morning, and then complain how sore his stomach is).  We are still on probation at work, for the next 2 months still, and yet, he's taken like his entire three years' worth of sick leave already.  He's not winning any popularity contests here either - people are getting sick of him, so I know I don't have to do anything, all I have to do is watch and let him hang himself...  But in the meantime, just having him around has made me very negative.  I have to watch for that.  I decided the other day that I wasn't going to let him bring me down, and normally I'm extremely positive (so much so that I annoy myself lol), but my thoughts have been very negative because of him.  It's a daily struggle.  But I love my job, and won't let him, or anybody else, ruin it for me.

From now on, I'm going to be me, and I'm going to be a bit selfish.  I need it - my focus is my family, not other people, not other "projects".

GTalk

So, you probably don't know, but there are a number of "Easter Eggs" inside GTalk that allow you to make little ponies run across the chat window, or change the background color of the window, or make a whole lot of little villagers run across the chat window with pitchforks.  Squirrel, of course, didn't know this, and I had an absolute ball with him yesterday - I was CRYING with laughter.

Squirrel:  Just got back from shopping

Squirrel:  wtf?

Squirrel:  lolol wtf??

Squirrel:  i'm seeing things

Nix:  what?

Squirrel:  little horses!

Nix:  what?

Squirrel:  again1

Squirrel:  cmon, little horses

Squirrel:  no!

Squirrel:  gtfo!  I'm loosing it

Nix:  wtf are you on about?

Squirrel:  little HORSES!!!!1

Squirrel:  fuck this

Squirrel:  my 

Squirrel:  little 

Squirrel:  pony!

Squirrel:  wtf

Squirrel:  lol

Squirrel:  I hope Leon realises that he is going to help put that battery in the car.  

Squirrel:  After the windscreen wiper/starter motor debacle   i try not to do car stuff

Nix:  sorry lkove, sec

Nix:  lol okay, i'll tell him

Squirrel:  thanks.  Time for me to get someting to eat.  We have cake and custard for supper

Nix:  now, what the hell were you going on about before the battery sentence?

Squirrel:  HORSES!  Invading my screen

Squirrel:  Little colorful ponies

Nix: omg, you're thinking of koring again!

Squirrel:  No, pink horses

Squirrel:  fuck!

Squirrel:  red ones1

Nix:  pink horses?

Squirrel:  red!!!!

Squirrel:  wtf?

Squirrel:  RED HORSES

Nix:  red??

Squirrel:  ARE you not listening?

Nix:  i'm trying to understand what the hell you're talking about!

Squirrel:  There

Nix:  where?

Squirrel:  Damnit

Squirrel:  It was an appaloosa

Squirrel:  I saw it

Nix:  an appaloosa?  not a different horse??

Nix:  going to smoke.  you try and find your mind

Nix:  love you ❤

Nix:  I'm back

Squirrel:  its just too disturbing

Squirrel:  the little horses are everywhere

Squirrel:  WTF

Squirrel:  Its my little ponies running all over the place,  I'm losing it

Squirrel:  I ate something

Squirrel:  maybe that will help

Squirrel:  cos I skipped breakfast toay

Squirrel:  So maybe I was starting to hallucinate.  I really thought I was seeing unicorns

Squirrel:  Lol

Nix:  LOL

Nix:  weirdo

Squirrel:  lol i am strange,  but its stopped now

Squirrel:  Still, i'm tired now from eating, so a quick nap will be in order

Squirrel:  What time are you guys leaving?

Nix:  3.30 only

Nix:  but that's pretty soon

Nix:  sos I'll see you shortly

Squirrel:  WTF!!!!

Squirrel:  Why is this happening

Squirrel:  Little Horses!

Squirrel:  Pink horses

Squirrel:  I'm going mad

Nix: now it's pink???

Squirrel:  Its ALWAYS been pink

Squirrel:  little horses

Squirrel:  this is crazy, why??

Nix:  you said red earlier

Squirrel:  no!

Squirrel:  FFs

Squirrel:  Pink

Squirrel:  Pink horses

Squirrel:  i'm going crazy

Nix:  you ARE crazy, didn't you know that?

Squirrel:  WTF

Squirrel:  No i'm logging of this thing,  i'm going mad

Squirrel:  It cannot be!

Squirrel:  They're running everywhere

Squirrel:  Yellow, pink

Nix:  I see nothing

Squirrel:  little ponies

Squirrel:  WTF

Squirrel:  Its still happening

Squirrel:  It cannot be

Squirrel:  Its that bloody Damian

Squirrel:  He probably went and got my PC hacked

Nix:  wtf?  what did damian do now?

Squirrel:  He infected my PC with the my little pony virus

Squirrel:  no

Nix:  what would damian do on a my little pony site?

Nix:  please love lol

Squirrel:  why me??

Squirrel:  Whats happening

Squirrel:  there is a little house

Squirrel:  with a dinosaur

Squirrel:  it wont leave

Nix:  wtf?  are you having a stroke??

Squirrel:  go away!

Squirrel:  I lo;;ed it!!! Hah!

Squirrel:  Killed ot

Squirrel:  killed it*

Squirrel:  and those stupid fking ponies

Squirrel:  AVG FTW

Squirrel:  waht

Squirrel:  wha

Squirrel:  why!!!!! 

Squirrel:  ffs nix there are little horses everywhre

Squirrel:  i'm going blind, granny van was right

Nix:  granny van??

Squirrel:  but my palms arent hariy

Nix:  wtf squirrel

Nix:  oh ROFL

Squirrel:  no more horses though

Squirrel:  Killed those fuckers

Nix:  lmao

Squirrel:  my little corpse booyah!

Squirrel:  why is everything green though? 

Squirrel:  no!!!1

Squirrel:  WTF

Squirrel:  was that?

Nix:  what?

Nix:  I'm watching you talk to yourself...

Nix:  /clear

Nix:  wc

Squirrel:  /clear

Squirrel:  didnt do a damn thing

Nix:  wrong window lol

Nix:  that's what you get for trying to program and watch gtalk

Squirrel:  nicky i'm telling you there are little horses running around my gtalk

Squirrel:  little horses!!!!!!!!

Squirrel:  i'll prove it

Nix:  running in gtalk?

Squirrel:  yes

Squirrel:  running

Nix: oh

Squirrel:  around the screen

Squirrel:  in gtalk

Nix:  i thought you had a game open or something

Nix:  i was trying to figure out what you were talking about

Squirrel:  in the fuckijng chat window!

Nix:  and how are you going to prove it?

Squirrel:  i wtf

Squirrel:  was that?

Squirrel:  i mailed them to you

Squirrel:  now i need a nap.

Squirrel:  you go ahead and get ready to come home 😀

Squirrel:  miss you love

Squirrel:  i have to get this shit out of my brain

Nix:  hahahaha

Nix:  I can't believe you sent me a video

Squirrel:  come home soon

Squirrel:  i had to do something

Nix: I will

Nix:  I love you

Nix:  sleep well.  try counting sheep instead of ponies 😛

❤

Squirrel:  lol will do